又一次，我掉進了漩渦！
三個月來，從拎著家當投靠朋友、含著淚出國、漸漸地從南美人的笑容裡找到慰藉，我掙扎地抓住了一根往上爬的繩索。
每天吃著自己開的藥，自我催眠「是自己太不敏感，事情早就變了樣。其實，這樣也好！」「如果這就是人生的低潮，那就哭著爬出來吧！」「勇敢些、樂觀些」。走在南美的街道、逐著這樣的想法，計畫著屬於「只有我自己」的下一步。
緩緩地，我的重心已經從「想開吧！」到「享受南美的人與景！」，身旁的朋友也不再問候「你好一點了嗎？」
我覺得，我好像跳脫這個漩渦，好一點了。
一個花了兩個月好不容易爬出來的泥淖
卻因突如其來的訊息，把我又拉回到兩個月前，甚至跌得更深更重。
現在的我，除了重新拾回我的藥、接收旁人擔心的眼神。
我得再度從漩渦裡找到更堅固的繩子。
或許，是命運要我拋掉「天性樂觀」的個性。
我已經沒有信心，什麼時候才爬得上來！
2008年5月11日 星期日
Lost 漩渦
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Dear Singing, been following your blog with huge interest, you are such a brave girl. Thanks for sharing. I don't know what bad news you've received, but pls. remain optimistic. In our life journey, we are bound to experience many downsides, my experience is to maintain our resillience, tell ourselves that this trough will pass, try to recognise our feelings and come out of it a much better person. Painful as our heart is suffering, try to soak yourself in this fantastic trip you are taking and hopefully, with time, you will be a lot more strengthened. My prayers will be with you. God Bless.
hi,
not sure what happened to you, just hope and pray that you will be fine.
tzuche
你娘前天寫了一個長訊息,但不幸失聯,大意是天涯何處無芳草,守得青山薪材燒不盡.
我在搖遠的台灣守護著你，要加油唷～
為了學妹們，快樂地走下去....
by the way, 還蠻同意你娘說法...
Emma
All,
I have felt much better now. Thanks. Got lots of sun tan in Tayrona National Park and Playa Blanca in Colombia. The white sand and beautiful beach mixing with people with various colors so recovered a bit.
Thank you very very much. Warm to receive your note. Love, Singing
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